Vermin Control The Redneck Way.
As I was wading through the mire and muck that is thought to be news and some blogs, I came across a little tid bit about an unlucky town that seems to have a coon problem. Yes the townspeople of Olympia Washington has a self induced coon infestation and are now in grieving due to many adorable kitty cats have been ravaged by the beasts they fed.... COONS.
This problem has become so bad they even had to hold a special town meeting to find some sort of resolve, however according to the article it sounds more like it was nothing more than a hand wringing hug fest. They are completely oblivious as to what they must do to solve this infestation and are asking... no pleading for help from others to solve it for them. What a bunch of idiotic pussies!
Now being a former country boy, I will give them some clues as to how we deal with such vermin. Mind you, none of then cures to the ailments is ever a pleasant end for the vermin. We country folk know the dangers that coons, opossums, ground hogs....etc. present to humans, live stock, crops etc. thus we take their intrusion onto our property seriously and do not treat them as a friendly neighbor coming by for a cup of coffee.
The Olympians have stated that the vermin have worn paths in certain places; they also have them timed as to when they appear. Now if this does not make tending to the situation much easier than I know what would. All they simply must do now is wait for the appointed time, at the appointed place and start shooting. Simple as pie. If they wish not to use an actual firearm, there is a wide array of pellet and bb guns readily available for use in such matters. In fact, some of them pack just as much punch in close range as what "real" firearms do. I guarantee that the vermin will take notice to this new threat to their lives and will change their habits. Little do most know though, after several lead pellets being embedded under the skin or in the muscle of an animal, well this does after time tend to cause infection and the animal eventually will die due to it. At least in my own experience they will.
If you happen to be a lazy ass or can't hit the broad side of a barn from five feet away, then persue the venue of traps. Of course, the politically correct way is the live trap. This has not been very effective in Olympia though because the vermin have wizened up to this. Therefore, I suggest using a real trap. You know the type, the leg bones are crushed, there is blood etc.... What fun it is! On the other hand, if they were not such pussies, they could have an old-fashioned coon hunt! Nothing like drunken redneck with their hounds out running around in the middle of the night with loaded weapons chasing coons!
The fact of the matter is simple. The residents started feeding these vermin and now the vermin has grown to such a population that they are now a serious threat. They have no fear of humans; they are attacking cats, small dogs, and terrorizing the ignorant in the town. Next, they will be attacking the people and larger animals. What will they do then when some child is mangled due to a pissed off coon? Bring a lawsuit against the city council for not tending to the infestation sooner when the residents themselves instigated it? In this liberal whiney assed town, I can see this coming.
In closing, I say grow up you pathetic small-minded wankers. You are not in elementary school anymore but you are adults. You brought this pestilence upon yourselves now go out and kill some coons. Learn a little about wildlife and understand that it can, and often times will hurt/kill you if not tended to. After all a good environmentalist is one that tends to the land, not letting the land tend him (a lesson from my Grandpa, a farmer from the old school).
All advice given was taken into consideration that this situation is within the city limits of Olympia, thus the restraint of using more effective means of ridding the vermin ... that is ... by using real weapons to disperse these critters.
Tags: Coons,Animal control ,liberals , whiney asses, Rednecks. Vermin Control The Redneck Way.